Saturday, February 06, 2010

Struggling

I’m trapped in the house (okay, apartment, whatever!) this weekend- a major storm hit us pretty hard. Both of my babysitting jobs were cancelled and while I had an insane week and should be enjoying my down time, I have *such* a hard time with it!

I just go, go, go all week, usually working 50-60 hours, but then when the weekend comes, I crash. And burn…and feel like a failure for being lazy. I’m lonely, and I hate it.

I’d love to be out enjoying the snow- sledding, taking a hike at the park in the snow, ice skating, something! Times like this are when I envy those with families, I wish I lived closer to my family (I haven’t seen most of them since Christmas, hopefully that will change next weekend), I wish I had a roommate who I was friends with (I have fond memories of the blizzard of ‘08, when I *did* live with a friend and we had a blast playing in the snow)…I’m just down & lonely this whole freaking year today.

See?

This is exactly *why* I prefer to stay busy, because it keeps the sad thoughts away.

I don’t want to grow old alone & lonely.
But I fear I will.

However, watching videos of this guy are currently making me laugh- which is a good thing. I find him funny, he would drive my dad absolutely nuts. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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5 comments:

  1. It's hard when you're trapped inside without friendly faces. Hang in there. I get that way too when left with too much time and too little to do.

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  2. Having too much time to think is not good...but some times we need it. We need to realize where we are so we can change something or be grateful for something else. Hang in there, before you know you'll be busy again.

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  3. {{hugs}} Hang in there. You are too smart and active to spend your life alone and lonely. You've had a lot of changes in the past few months, but you will build new friendships. It just takes time.

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  4. I'd say if you want to go enjoy the snow, then go out and enjoy it. You can go alone, that's fun too!

    Have you considered joining a club on meetup.com? Maybe for sledding, skiing, hiking, ANYTHING- it's a great way to meet new people who share your same interests.

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  5. All week I'm so busy and think I'll enjoy a Sunday alone, but by the end of the day I'm depressed from being alone. I hope your weather clears up soon!

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Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. Comments warmly welcomed! :-)