I find it fascinating that how other people see us is not at all how we see ourselves- I am definitely my worst critic. While I view myself and my life as boring and overly blah these days, through talking with my boss and some of my coworkers, they don’t see me like that.
Where I see babysitting as a way not to think about being lonely and make some extra cash, they are glad I pour my extra time into enjoying kids (which I do!).
My boss? She didn’t know I even had half a wish to get married until last year. She thought I wanted to live an independent life, traveling on a whim wherever my heart desires. She doesn’t think I’m afraid of anything, where in reality I’m afraid of a lot of things (being alone, driving on icy roads, appendicitis). I laughed when she told me she thought I was fearless.
I’m dependable (that one extends to all of my life, I think) and people at work enjoy joking with me because they know I can fire it back. That is one of the best feelings in the world for me lately- being able to joke with my coworkers. It’s as if I’m part of an exclusive club and I’m pretty sure if we were stranded on an island together, the majority of us would survive just fine as a hilarious team. I’ve been called goofy, strict, hilarious, bold, easygoing, flexible, fast-paced and task oriented all in one day and even though this year has been rough and I won’t pretend it hasn’t been, my workplace and coworkers bring out what I’d like to think is the best in me.
Working with the kids though, I have a different persona. Especially this year, I *have* to be the lead teacher, strict as all get out but still loving with the kids. As soon as I step in the door, it’s a complete switchover from single gal into headstrong, bossy teacher lady, sometimes a transformation that even I laugh at. The kids don’t think I have parents, they think I’m old, and sometimes they tell me that teachers aren’t supposed to laugh- that usually takes place when I’m laughing about one of their antics!
This week, I’m going to make an effort to look through other’s eyes when viewing myself. I’m optimistic that it will be a great week- work and otherwise! Are there qualities people admire in you that you have a hard time seeing in yourself??